Step Daughter of the Prophet ﷺ Zaynab bint Abi Salama (ra)

What comes to mind if you think of a step parent? It’s sad but some might think of Cinderella and her wicked step mother. At heart a story of conflicted relationships that needn’t be that way. Although a fairy tale, it epitomises a human failing. But let me tell you another story– a real life story, both inspiring and epitomising the height of human kindness.  

Zaynab bint Abi Salama (ra) never knew her own father, Abu Salama (ra). He died whilst her mother Umm Salama (ra) was pregnant carrying her. When she was born Umm Salama’s waiting period (‘idda) ended. A widow of noble lineage with four children, she turned down marriage proposals, believing none could be better than Abu Salama – until one day the Prophet’s ﷺ proposal came. She hesitated and tried to excuse herself saying she had children, but the Prophet ﷺ reassured her, “Your children are my children.” [Nasa’i]  

So they married and true to his words the Prophet ﷺ came to care for Zaynab in every way a father does for a beloved daughter and she for him, the only father she knew.

Whenever the Prophet ﷺ visited Umm Salama he would first ask after Zaynab;

 “Where is our Zaynab?” For in his ﷺ eyes there was no distinction between his own children and stepchildren.

Anas ibn Malik (ra) said: The Prophet ﷺ would play with Zaynab, the daughter of Umm Salama and would keep saying (playfully calling her), “O Zaynab! O Zaynab!” [al-Mukhtārah]

Ibn Al-Qayyim said of Zaynab: “She came by the Prophet ﷺ  whilst he was making wudu and he splashed water (from what he was using) on her face. The result was that her face remained looking young until she grew very old.” [Al-Isti’aab]

Life in the Prophet’s ﷺ household left Zaynab secure in every sense, never made to feel a burden or like unwanted baggage. Instead she thrived, learning, narrating from her mother and her step mothers (the other wives of the Prophet ﷺ) like Aisha (ra), Zaynab bint Jahsh (ra) and Umm Habibah (ra).

Zaynab bint Abi Salama (ra) became a scholarly figure, with great knowledge of fiqh, and of her generation came to be sought after as one of the most knowledgeable woman of her time.🌙

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